Progression of life

Omg, I finally figured out how to change this damn font. . . I knew it was possible to do, but for some odd reason it never occured to me to click 'compose'... >_> Shows how my intelligence is slipping. ^^;; So anyways. Let's see... Things have been pretty good lately ^_^ Nothing to complain about. Well, besides my crazy family, but everybody has some little oddities about their home...at least I think so o_O; So I'll just ignore them as always ^o^ Works best that way. No point in complaining about something that will never change @_@

Anyways. It seems like the hostilities between past interests and I have been resolved...if only temporarily. But out with the old in with the new! ha ha...So on with that. He's awesome. Seriously. I'm like, so ridiculously calm all the time now. . . I've actually began to think there's something not normal about how wonderful it all seems. But screw that, I'll just bask in the bliss e_e....Really...It's like I have all the benefits of a fakin' awesome friendship plus...well....more awesome <____> I don't even know how to explain it. It's just...no stress. At all. None... and it seems to be only getting better.....I think most of this post is going to be how awesome he is... But of course if I said who it was it'd totally ruin the current awesomeness aspects ^___^

Anyways...continuing...It's just odd...usually I'm a pretty pushy person when I really like someone...but this time is just different...I'm perfectly content (really 100 times more than ecstatic) about the way things are going. The pace is perfectly perfect for the situation...just a shame he had to be ruined first >_> But maybe his bad past experience will only make things better for us ^^ That's how I'm feeling about it anyways...

I'm a lot more comfortable around him than I've been with anyone else in the past ^_^ Yet I'm still able to hush myself about things that don't matter (but women still nag about anyways)...for the most part...and even though I'm not nagging I'm still able to tell him that they're nagging at me .. heh. Which works perfectly because it stops that little pin that sticks me in the head from popping my brain @_@ ..weird way of putting it I suppose but that's what a women's nagging feels like...fucking flies buzzing right in your ear. -_-' So if it's that annoying to me I'd hate to put a guy I like through all that, lol. ^-^ So thusly that's my reasoning. For what? I don't know, it just sounded right. I just feel like my life has been brightened :D! How awesome is that? I KNOW! Fakin' awesome ^__________________^! I really am in a rediculously good mood.

Anyways, from all this it seems things have been going smoother as far as daily life goes. I don't feel like I have a dragging weight on me ~_~ Ya know, where it's like "I'm just going to sit on the cough all day watching trash tv" thing. o_O Weird. So I totally chopped some tree weeds from the back yard...we'll see if I feel like cleaning up the mess today or tomorrow >_> It depends on if my family gets on me to do it or not. If they do, I'll just..yeah...not finish. I hate it when they tell me to do something I'm already planning to do...especially when it's not even my responsibility -_- Fakin' do it yourself. Geez. Oh well. Enough of that.

School's also going well. There now studying for another test. Hopefully I'll be able to take it tomorrow. Seems my teacher isn't here today. Odd. Guess she just wasnt' feeling well. Kinda sad when she's not here, she really is the best teacher I've had in awhile. Very encouraging ^^! She's just so nice, and I can tell she really cares about how I progress. Well. That's the end of my post, hope you're happy Scott :P Frickin' complain too much about me not posting. I posted twice last month! >_<... Alright, well, yep. Done :DD!

hmmm...

So yeah, in PA again...I really like coming up here...but there's been a few things bothering me lately....Still having problems with going to see the kid and what not...also, frickin' ex....-_- I don't know why he still talks to me...It's like, we haven't been together in like a year and whenever I'd try to contact him he'd blow me off...then when I finally am like 'whatever' he messages me. o_O The hell. So I just told him to basically bug off. u_u; It's not like I hate him (maybe) but I can't keep doing this...it makes me feel ...hmm... I don't know exactly...but it can't be healthy o_O If he wants a friendship that's fine, but don't talk to me only when it's convenient for you. Ya know? ~_~ Bah....

Anyways, Suppose to start school in January, early enrollment starts next month, though I am officially registered...Financial Aid seems to have gone through, that's good....Still a few things I need to work out in my personal life...>__>;; But...yeah...

My sister's cat had surgery yesterday...that's odd....o___o; I don't know if I'd have done the same thing in her spot...though I would have wanted to, I just couldn't spend that much on a cat >_<;; Enless I really had it...but I don't believe (actually I know) that she wasn't exactly expecting it to be what it was...and once you spend money trying you kinda don't want to feel like it was for nothing...so I guess it makes sense...Oh well, hopefully he'll be around for a long time ^o^

Err...Not much else...just yeah...tired, so I think that'll be it for now ^_^ Though I don't think I'm really looking forward to leaving here tomorrow ( in fact quite the opposite ) ... I am happy I'll be home with my family again ^o^ Hooray, get to see my precious Kimberly...she's such a good girl ^___^ aww... n__n.... at least one of them is <____> Yep. That's it. :D

Mmhm

In PAAAAAaaaaa. Yep. Don't fucking feel like posting lately. Fucking lame. Seriously. Fuck. So yep. I may do so eventually, but for now, this is all it gets. Things are pretty great though n_n Happy. Entertained. Mmhm. It seems like when I'm up here things don't bother me so much, so that's good o___o; Much better at avoiding agrivating situations...it's called hiding o________________________o... May get to see a certain small one on Saturday. That's good. Makes me happy ^_^ Even thogh certain people may not be too fond of the idea. Too bad. ^___^ Makes me happy...well..not that I may piss someone off, but that I'll actually be able to see her >_o; Mmhm, yep. So yeah, since there's a massive screen, I'm not going to type too much since like, this is, like, my diary. >_> So yeah. That's it for now. Mmhm, yep, bye.

ha. Nice.

AHAHAA. Ya know, I was reading back a few posts, and ya know, I did kinda lose my wallet? Which was what I had been planning to say...But I didn't really 'lose' it. It was STOLLEN from me by an EVIL WENCH. Ldjajds. Yep. Sister. So yeah, n_n just thought it was quite laughable. Ya know, the irony. So yeah, going home in a few days. Hopefully will get to visit Canada before hand. mmhm. Yup.

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OMG WHY HAVE I BEEN ABANDONED ;o; ..............................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
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You suck. Call me.

Time Spent

So anyways, I can't really edit this font since it seems that the page isn't loading correctly...I'll fix it before I'm done if it ever loads...So yeah, Setsuna leaves pretty soon...It seems like it kinda went by fast...but then again, that's probably because it hasn't been time well spent...I feel like we could have done alot more, but oh well...I think I was a bit of a bitch for the majority of it ~_~ Hopefully we'll be able to go to Cedar point before he leaves on the fifth...I still need to figure out what the hell I'm doing with my life...I get confused alot...It's really difficult..like, trying to figure out what will benifit me more in the long run, ya know? Ah well...I've been feeling a bit more upbeat the last few days...figure the best thing to do is not think about relationship stuff so much, less stress that way. Better not to think about the future of things ~_~...Anyways, it hurts to type in this position, so that's it. n_n yep.

huh?

So, anyways. This is what's up. I'm going to Ohio in two days...well, leaving for there anyways. I won't actually get there until Wednesday...which will be, oh yeah, two days. So yeah, I leave in one day I guess then, right? huh. Yep. So I'll meet Scott. I'm pretty sure since he hasn't really given me any good pictures or let me see him on webcam that I won't even know it's him when I get there. So for all I know some random black guy will hit on me and I'll be all like "yeah, I'm I suppose to go home with you?" o_o so Seriously, like, Scott. You better come up to me and just be like "I love you. Come sleep in my home" Because like, I'd be all like "OKAY =DDD" And it will be awesome, so that's the game plan, okay? u_u So yep. That's how it's going to go down. Anyways, god, there's this little bug flying around the screen and I just can't seem to get it..wait...it's gone....anyways...yep. no wait...it's back..gone...did I kill it? ............. maybe.. so yeah, I'm like, tired. It's like, 3:33am..ahahah...really, it is *points* so yep. . . . tired... Scott went to sleep all early tonight. That's ghey. Cause like, when I'm there, he's going to be all sleeping...and I'm going to be all hyper. Night time is my thing. I love going on walks all late n_n it's wonderful. tired...god...it sucks...I don't even have anything...wait...what was I saying?,,oh yeah, I don't have anything to talk about really...I just felt like posting...But I'm too tired to think of anything to really complain about..even though I really have already complained....ooh...soo...yep...well, anyways...I can't think anymore, so maybe I should go to sleep. I need to pack tomorrow...god...and I was lecturing him before he left...I'm just as bad....specially with the dots....and like...stuff....oh god ;_; I'm like Scott .o. Watch me lose my ...n/m ..not going to jinx it. 'night.

*sigh*

Meh. So anyways. Continuation of earlier. So yeah, more stuff since then. Apparently my friend has cancer. Nice, ay? So yeah...I mean, I didn't think it had bothered me so much, I was actually wondering why I was taking it so well then my stomach starting hurting really bad and I got sick ~_~ So apparently I don't think I'm worried about stuff but it seems to physically affect me. =\ I can't even tell anymore. I'm already stressed about so much shit...it's like, just one more thing to add to the list. So yeah, I'm really worried about it. She's such a good person yet she always seems to go through the worst situation imaginable. Ah well. That's life I suppose. I'm trying to keep my mind off it for now, hopefully she'll be fine. She's stubborn as hell, so I think she'll be okay ^_^

Anyways...yeah...blah. I don't really feel like writting anything...I wonder if Scott ever got time on his phone...meh...it almost seems pointless since he leaves on the first...but oh well....*SIGH* Blah. I don't know what I feel like doing right now. There's nothing really...it's just..boring...and late....but I don't feel like going to sleep just yet...want to listen to some music before I get ready for bed. Otherwise I'll just sit up thinking about everything half the night. I really can't afford to do that since I have so much stuff to do tomorrow. My sister is doing her birthday party thing tomorrow since she didn't have time last week due to different evening events. Also there's a church memorial day thing...yep. Church food. I'm all over that most likekly. So yeah, anyways. I'm about ready for bed I think. I'm pretty tired from the day's events.

So yep. Later.

random shortness

Hm..I'm trying to keep up with this alittle more, just to vent...

Have you ever noticed how music can enhance a mood you're in? Like, I listen to alot of love songs and sad music...Maybe that's why I'm always so depressed >_o; It's like I have a certain view in my head of the way things are suppose to be, yet they never seem to go that way. I live in a fantasy world ~_~

Anyways, I have work again next week =D This is awesome. If I keep getting little jobs like this that are only two days a week I should be able to afford to go see Scott and actually have the time to go for four or five days ^_^ Way better than just two days. I would be highly disapointed if that's all the time I got to spend with him. Though the money situation in general pretty much sucks...I'll only be getting around $120 a week...meh. It will take me a few weeks to have enough to go. I was really hoping to have a car to go there with...But I won't -.- And I'll have to take a bus, it's cheaper than going by plane. Ah well...

So let's talk about a few things that have been making a bit depressed besides that.

Even though I probably said something about them in the last blog.

Okay, so I've always had alot of guy friends, I don't get along with girls so well. So yeah..I've had alot of guys hitting on me and what not and it's just getting really fucking annoying. It's like, god, seriously, back off -_- Everyone knows I'm taken so I just feel like it's disrespectful. Ya Know?

But yeah. okay. I decided against talking about it for now. I'm busy. So yeah. Post again laterz =D Ciao.

Past the Point of No Return

Has your head ever been cluttered with different thoughts that you couldn't even think? Mine is. Meh. I'm so rediculously stressed out about things that do and don't matter. I'm too young to be so worried about different things.

Anyways, I'm just pretty much sitting here listening to songs from Andrew Lloyd Webber's Phantom of the Opera. I like the music n_n I pretty much just love Symphony music ^___^ It's so soothing...at least I think so. I really need to start digging out some old musicals...Hey. I'm a classy girl u_u

So yeah, I work tomorrow. Thank. God. Seriously. I needs me some dollars. ahaha. So yeah. It's only for two days supposidely. I really should be home right now asking/begging my mother to drive me to the whereabouts of this place so I can find it in the morning. I have to be there at nine. Honestly, I don't even know exactly what time of work it is. So yeah. I really should get these detals ahead of time. Ah well. Stuff happens. Really. So anyways...

Scott's coming to the USA =DDD I'm pretty excited about it. I'm just hoping I'll be able to spend more time with him than just a weekend. u.u; I know that would be quite disapointing to him. Plus, like, yeah. I want to. ^_^ He really is great, I just wish he wouldn't be all non-shalant er whatever when I talk to him ._.; Or when I say certain things. I guess that's just what I get for not saying it for a few months. I just get confused sometimes...And I don't like saying things unless I really feel them, ya know? Plus when you do say it it just makes it all the more special ^o^ *sigh* Anyways...Yeah...

I finished Elfen Lied today. It was good...Not nearly as messed up as School Days however. It's insane. Seriously. Watch it. ahaha. I was about to spoil it slightly but than I backspaces >D EVIL ME, HUH? Guess you'll just have to watch it. Btw. People. Look up "When I'm not near the girl I love" from the musical Finian's Rainbow. I love that movie clip. It's cute. For an old movie. Still love it.

So yeah, also..I'm on an all veggie-fruit diet. Even though I just cheated alittle bit on it >_> I won't go into detail on the cheating though. ahahaha. I'm trying ^_^ Only drinking green tea and water..mostly green tea though. I really really would like some meat something right now. Seriously. Btw, how the hell do people wear those ear headphone thingies? They hurt my little ears ;_; Ah well. That's what I get for having small features ._.; I say they're cute =DDD Oh oh, I get to stop by Brandon's work today and get a samich. Hooray for Samiches! =DD Frickin' special super awesomeness! ^_^ Ahaha..So yeah...

Anyways. I have my license now. Also my GED. I got a really good score on it too ^_^ Hopefully I'll be starting college within the next year. That'd be sweet. Not looking like the fall though, unfortunetly. u.u; Ahwell, I'm done ^_^